Across The Way Thread #15846
Remember the day River died
Created Byriver_chris
Created DateThu, Apr 01, 2004
Created Time02:50PM GMT

river_chris4/1/2004 2:50:01 PM
Robin4/1/2004 5:02:41 PM
cera4/2/2004 10:42:49 AM
in_rio4/2/2004 12:50:03 PM
Kate4/3/2004 10:45:42 AM
Liisa4/4/2004 6:53:49 AM
Veera4/4/2004 11:00:00 AM
Lil* Sis714/6/2004 9:40:00 PM
daniellepoco4/7/2004 1:44:26 PM
daniellepoco4/8/2004 12:19:30 AM
Total Messages For This Thread: 10
AuthorMessage #32398
river_chrisSubjectRemember the day River died
PostedThu, Apr 01, 2004 02:50PM GMTMethodWeb-Site
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Hi River fans
I just finished my latest book about River "Running on empty" and by
the way its great, but reading it made me think back to the day he
died and I found out.
Many people say they remember the day when President Kennedy got
shot or when Princess Diana got killed, and what they did and
thougt, and I was wondering if anyone at atw remember when River
died and what they thought and did that day.
I definetely remember that day very clearly and would like to share
that moment with you all. I think it will be kind of comforting
reading and hearing about our joined feelings to the remarkarble
person who made all of us so happy and in some way united, so please
reply back if you feel like it.
I remember Now.1 1993. I was 17, and got up early in the morning
because my parents had to go to work and my kid brother to school,
and it was nice being together in the morning.
I didn`t go to school anymore and didn`t had any job, so I stayed
home and watched the dog.
My brother and I watched some tv and on super channel we saw this
memorial portrait on River. I knew him only as the Young Indiana
Jones and I knew he was in a movie once along with 3 other boys who
walked along a railroad to find a body. I didn`t know the movie, but
remember it was a good movie. The reason I watched this mamorial
show was because I wanted to know why they will show something with
him this early in the morning, but then they showed a movie clip
from Running on empty and the in slow motion the clip from Mosquito
coast, where he watch his father die and then cry, and the speaker
said "This prommissing actor will be missed" I felt so sad
immidiately but don`t know why because I was not a fan, and I only
knew 2 class mates who were fans of him.
I told my brother that I thought he was very young only a couple of
years older than me, and that it was strange he would die so young.
I said he probably died because of drug abuse, but of course no one
knew that this early.
The whole day I thought about life, making something out of your
life, and how friggle life is. All I met and knew got the same line
from me that River Phoenix had passed away, and I started to watch
all the news and read the text tv.
On Mtv shortly after his passing there were this text tv information
saying that Rivers death was a mystery because they autopsy said,
that there were no drugs in his body and that the not confirmed
conclusion was, that he probably died because of heart failure duing
to much work. I felt so bad thinking I had "accused" him of dying
from drug abuse, and wanted to honor him and keep him alive for
eternaty, and by being a fan I would do so.
Actually I think I became a fan the day he died, becausse the more I
read about him the closer I felt to his spirit and believings. He
was a nature boy as I was, He recented the ciry life as I did, he
loved animals as I did and he wanted to save the rain forests as I
did, so He really became more than my idol. He was my hero, my "big
brother" and the person that I could look up to and live the life he
As time went by I was of course being more and more aware of how
much we have in common, and actually for a hole year I was kind of
depressed, that he was no longer with us. My collection with River
items grew bigger and bigger and it was such a joy getting something
knew added to my collection, because that would be my tribute to
honor his life, my way of letting him be immortallized and make him
that hero, icon, legend and myth that I think he was/is.
One day I got the news that I would fear getting but somehow knew
would come, that River did die of drug abuse, and allthough that it
is a fact today that he did, some part of me just won`t except it,
because he was to good a person to die this way, and Hollywood and
the movie business can stink and if they all could save money by
having River dead of drugs instaed of they being "responsible" of
his death duing stress and to much work, they would probably prefer
that the "fact" being River dying of drug abuse.
Of course this may sound silly to most of you and this thread is
really not meant to be a discussing thread of how and what he died
of. I guess its just a way for a devoted fan to let his feelings
out, and still today so many years after Rivers passing away, have
some difficulty accepting he now only lives in our hearts and minds,
but at least he will live safe there for etanerty.
Love to get some feedback from you guys and hear your story.
Take care everyone

president of the river phoenix fan club
AuthorMessage #32403
RobinSubjectRe: Remember the day River died
PostedThu, Apr 01, 2004 05:02PM GMTMethodWeb-Site
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Thank you so much for sharing that Chris. That warms my heart reading
what you wrote. Simply beautiful I was fifteen when River passed
away and as much as I would not like to say this, I actually don't
remember that particular *day* or the moment that I found out about
his death at all ( I remember the time period and hearing about it
but that's really it. I remember feeling sad and sorry that he died
so young but at that time it wasn't a life altering experience for
me. I know that there are so many of you here that have been a fan of
his for a long time and I wish that I could say the same thing too. I
am a new fan of River's, which makes me feel sort of uncool at times,
hehehehehe, but I know that there must have been a reason as to why I
became a fan of his in the first place. Even though I am a *newbie* I
know that my love for him is not a flash in the pan feeling. I
became a fan of his last year. All of a sudden after never having
thought much about him before, I had a dream with him in it. Ever
since then I have been trying to seek out why this happened. Why, out
of all of the people in the entire world, did I subconsciously end up
seeking out River Phoenix? I don't want to make myself sound weird
or anything because I know that absolutely *everyone* here on this
list has been touched by River in some way which is why we are all
here. I truly feel that when I read everyone's messages.
Like you, Chris, when I found out more about River's life, I realized
that he and I had things in common. I understand the over-
sensitivity that he bore, his contradictions and his
divided/conflicted soul.

Whoops! Rereading my post I realize that I sort of strayed from the
topic of discussion but your post got me into thinking other
things..sorry everyone. Talk later!


AuthorMessage #32419
ceraSubjectRe: Remember the day River died
PostedFri, Apr 02, 2004 10:42AM GMTMethodWeb-Site
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like robin i wasn`t a fan yet when he died, and cannot remember that
exact day. i was nine years old and it must be around that time when
he died when i first heard about him,. about 2 years later was when
i first watched the movie stand by me, and i can remember that day.
and at the end i saw his name in the credits and remembered that he
was dead. he played 12year old chris chambers in there, and i was
about that age when i watched the movie first. and that was when i
first really noticed him. and he touched me in the movie and when i
later found out that he was that dead actor it touched me even
more.anyway, after that i started becoming a fan
its kind of off topic too. but i am a sort off glad that i wasnt a
fan yet when he died, so it saved me from alot of pain. becoming a
fan of someone you already know is dead is not painless but still
AuthorMessage #32422
in_rioSubjectRe: Remember the day River died
PostedFri, Apr 02, 2004 12:50PM GMTMethodWeb-Site
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Hi Chris,
Thank you very much for sharing your story. It´s moving. Well, I
remembered exactly the day I heard of River´s passing. My mom, uncle
and I were at restaurant and I picked up a chinese newspaper and
began to read it. There´s a little article in the news section about
the death of River Phoenix. At that moment, I was spreechless and
mainly confused.. The article is in chinese and so do the name of
River, so I thought that the journalist might make a mistake and it´s
impossible that River died. I called my sister immediately and asked
her if she heard about it. My sister isnt interested in River and she
told me she had no clue. Anyways, I tried to find infos about it but
no other newspapers had mentioned the news. And I was just confused
for days and believed that it´s not true with River´s passing.
I was working in a record shop next to Stock Exchange in Central,
Hong Kong at that time and there´s a magazine store selling US and Uk
magz next to our shop. A couple of days later ( I dont remember
exactly which day..) on my way to ladies room in the mall, I had a
quick look in the magazine store and that People magazine with River
on the cover was in front of me. I asked the sales there to give me
the magz. I read it real quick on my way back to the record shop and
realised that it´s not a mistake, not a joke with River´s death. When
I went to the shop, I looked so shocked that my boss and workmate
asked whats going on with me. I cant say a word but only started
crying. They were really shocked seeing my reaction. I didn´t really
talk for the rest of day. I was desvatated and full of sorrow. When I
went back home, I lay down in bed and looked at the wall with River´s
posters and cried. I tried to talk with my sisters about it but since
they weren´t not interested in River, they can´t relate with my
saddness. It was extremely hard time for me even I´ve experienced the
death of my other idol ( a singer / guitarist from a Hong Kong
rockband called Beyond who died at the age 31 because of a TV show
accident )just a couple of months ago. That singer was popular in
Hong Kong and many of my friends loved him much, so we can talk about
it and share our pain and sorrow.. But with River, I dont know anyone
else who liked him so much like I I was all alone with my
sorrow. River was my longtime idol.I grew up from a 13 years old
young girl who only started liking him because of his handsome pinup
boy look and his role in Stand by me to a 17 years old young adult
who not only discovered how talented he was but also getting involved
and interested in the important issues and messages like Rainforest,
nvironment protection, humanism beacuse of him. He showed me what´s
important in this world. He opened my eyes and heart. He was my
personal hero and played a very very important part in my life. It´s
just so hard for me to accept that he´s gone at that time. I was
totally down after knowing the death of River. I kept on asking
myself why that happened to River?? I had only lots of WHY in my
head..The truth was so cruel.
I remembered exactly that I bought Just Seventeen with River´s
interview in Nov ( it´s published first after his death ) He talked
about children, marriage, future etc which made me even sadder. So
since then I avoided everything related with River for years. It was
too hard for me to see him walking, talking, laughing in movies..It
only made me cry. But something happened nearly 3 years ago.. one day
I turned on TV and Stand by me was showing.. normally I would turn it
off and avoid it, but this time not. I just stood there and watched
the whole film till the end. I didnt cry.. All my memories, all my
feelings with River just came up again. I thought of him a lot and
decided to look for his websites ónline. Thats why I found ATW and am
really happy to know that River still touched countless souls. It
still happens that I am a bit sad reading books about his life but
usually, I feel peaceful and not sad anymore about his passing. I am
thankful that he gave us so much gifts, pleasure and happiness
through his films and music. I am thankful that he gave me so much
beautiful memories. I am thankful that he opened my eyes and guide me
to see the world in different sights. I am forever thankful for that.
As long as we have him in our hearts, he´s never really gone away.
He´s in all of us! THANK YOU, RIVER!


AuthorMessage #32448
KateSubjectRe: Remember the day River died
PostedSat, Apr 03, 2004 10:45AM GMTMethodWeb-Site
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I was only 3 when river died, so i don't really remember the cool stories everyone.... i like readin them!
Total Messages: 10 Page 1 of 2
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